(This piece aired on Kansas Public Radio in early August.)

This year marks the 65th anniversary of film version of The Wizard of Oz, and I'd like to say once and for all—I hate this film. I'm done with it, and not just because of the saccharine sweet songs or the nightmarish set designs, which are like German Expressionism gone horribly wrong. No, I hate The Wizard of Oz because of what it has done to this state. The thing is, you can't go to the movies or turn on the television without hearing "we're not in Kansas anymore," or "there's no place like home." These catchphrases are everywhere, and hearing them always makes me cringe. When this whimsical little movie came out in 1939, who would have guessed that it would saturate our culture so thoroughly? Who would have guessed it would become so representative of our identity as Kansans?

When asked that question about the five people I'd have to dinner, if I could choose from anyone in the entire scope of human history, the first two who always come to mind are Lincoln and Douglas. This is so I could hear them argue the merits of popular sovereignty between bites of Hamburger Helper. I'd egg them on, too. "Oooh. Good one Abraham," I'd say. "What do you say, Stephen? You gonna take that from him?"